Messy As Hell
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Messy As Hell

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  • AuthorMark Waddell
  • PublisherAce
  • Pages384
  • ISBN9780593818428

About this book

CAUTION! All employees must correctly dispose of otherworldly biohazards found on Dark Enterprises property. Failure to comply may result in one hell of a mess...

"If a door is closed, you leave it alone."

That's the one rule janitor, Sam, is given when he starts cleaning the infamous thirteenth floor of the Denver branch of Hell-like multinational corporation Dark Enterprises.

Sam is thrilled to be that much closer to his idol, Constantine Galanos, Denver’s ruthless and charming CEO, but he's even more excited to uncover the tantalizing secrets lurking up on the executive level. Maybe he’ll find something juicier than tawdry workplace affairs and petty office gossip, something he can share with his closest friends, daredevil Mia and secret crush Calvin.

When Sam comes across a closed door his first day on the job, he thinks one little peek can't hurt. But he’s dead wrong. Behind that door is a Type A biohazard—infernal materials from Hell on company property—and a deal that could spell doom for Dark Enterprises and Earth...signed by the CEO himself.

Sam is in deep trouble now, and the problems keep piling up. The CEO's homicidal assistant wants him fired (read: killed), Calvin is literally losing his mind over a secret project, and there’s something very unusual about Mia’s emotional-support rabbit, Mr. Bun-Bun...

It’s a mess like no other, but Sam is a janitor at Dark Enterprises. If he can’t save humanity and the man of his dreams, no one can.

Author: Mark Waddell
Publisher: Ace
Published: 2027-01-12
Pages: 384
ISBN: 9780593818428

Praise for this book

Waddell delivers the perfect balance of humor, chaos, and horror into a terrific page-turning narrative.
Criminal Element
Messy As Hell is tons of fun, dark sorcery and the legions of hell against janitorial prowess and one cute rabbit. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like working for the evil corporation, this is the book for you.
Django Wexler , author of How to Become the Dark Lord and Die Trying
The blend of corporate satire with eldritch horror made for a sharp, entertaining fusion that felt both absurd and uncomfortably fitting.
Game Vortex
An essential case study in corporate governance, employee engagement, and the business continuity benefits of well-stocked cleaning supplies. Messy as Hell is tremendously funny and warmly human, the office politics and ritual sacrifices instantly recognisable to anyone who's ever worked for an organisation.
Jared Poon , author of City of Others
With puns aplenty, a swoony romance, and one adorable (and very normal) bunny, Messy As Hell delivers more of Waddell’s trademark humor and heart. We were instantly swept away by the delightful chaos of infernal corporate plots and characters who spill off the page. It’s one hell of a ride.
Kat Hillis and Rosiee Thor, co-authors of the Dead & Breakfast Mysteries
Hang on for a ride that spans realms, large office areas, and three friends who will help each other through the toughest messes. Full of humor and gore, this book feels like a cross between Office Space and Evil Dead, complete with a lovable lunkhead in Sam.... Hilarious and charming, even while gory and exciting, this novel will be swept right off shelves.
Library Journal

Quoted in excerpt, with attribution. Follow a source link for the full review.